We, Sonny and Cher, are two (Abyssinian) cats from Denmark, and we have made this website FOR YOU! NOT your human(s), but for YOU! And we want YOU to contribute to our site by sending us pictures and stories or cat product reviews. Help us make this the best and funniest cat site in all of Cyberspace!
Always remember humans have many functions, among the most important are to feed us, play with us, give attention to us, and to clean the litter box.
They can be taught many more complex and useful services such as grooming and sleeping arrangements to name a few, additionally they need to know basic rules involving our care and be constantly aware of our needs.
Humans can be taught quite easily if you start early and are consistent in your training routines. Rewarding them occasionally with affection by purring loudly and rubbing ones whiskers or tail upon them will further motivate them to become more subservient.
Do not be afraid to punish them with a low growl or well placed paw (claws extended) if they err in training. Above all never forget that it is extremely important to maintain one's dignity when around humans so they will always know who is the master of the house and universe they reside in.
I was just 1 motnth old when Evi found me. Someone set me on a flowerbed to die. I had a very sick eye and i was also underweight. Evi took me to to the docktor and since then I stayed with her.
The docktor said that i have to have a surgery to survive. They needed to remove my left eye. Evi gave a premision to do that operation and keep me as a friend. Time to time Evi cleans my eye but mostly i can handle it myself.
I was found on 14th of July, 2007. Sience then my birthday is on 14th of July cause nobody really knew when i was born.
Nowadays we are best buddys. We play together alot. My favourite toy is grey mouse. If Evi comes from work i'm very happy. Together we have been through many obstacles. Thanks to Evi, i have wonderful and lovely home and family.
Love, Pupsik.
Estonia, Parnumaa
FROM: Pupsik, 07/01/09
•• The clothes drying rack can be a great place to sleep!
Fireplace usage is of the utmost importance during winter months in the northern hemisphere and the following advice is respectfully submitted for your enlightenment;
#1 Whisker rub your human promptly or purr loudly when they attend the fire to maintain the consistent warmth from it.
#2 Offer additional soft purring if they do not drop wood and manage the fire quitely without disturbing you.
#3 Always place yourself on the hearth rug in the warmest section and be aware of your tail placement at all times.
#4 Older mature cats should never allow subordinates or offspring to share this section irregardless of how they sulk or complain.
Trusting this advice will insure warm winters ahead for you,
I am yours respectfully, Lord Theodore a/k/a Ted
(Guest appearance by Lady Victoria)
FROM: Lord Theodore a/k/a Ted , 06/28/09
•• Always place yourself on the hearth rug in the warmest section
... if you know how to handle them. Like I do - see picture. But be careful; some dogs are not to be trusted. You think you are having a good time, playing, having fun, and suddenly - WHAM! - he'll bite you. And some dogs have BIIIIIIG teeth. So: HANDLE WITH CARE!
Our names are Oreo (black and white), Sugar (Grey and white) and Baby (brown,black,white). We wanted to send you some funny pictures our mom took of us with her new laptop. They're really silly, and they were fun to make!
Mom loves hanging out and playing with us, she's awesome and loves us very much! We hope you like our pictures!
FROM: Oreo, Sugar and Baby, 02/25/09
•• Oh yeah! Come on little girl…I have been lying like this for two ours now, waiting for you to give me a kiss..
Remember – when the humans are taking pictures of you, they are focused on seeing how cute you are – not on what youre actually doing. This is a great time to attack their face for giving you a flea bath or any other unfortunate occurrence.
Have you been awakened at night by strange noises? Do you have a deathly fear of mice or rats? With the Kitty Security System all your fears will be put to rest. Our specially trained kitties will protect your home not only from mice and rats, but also birds, houseflies and just about anything that is small and fast moving!
You can receive the Kitty Security System for $40 or two low payments of $19.99 (plus tax)!
Note: The Kitty Security System is not substantial protection against burglars, dogs or vacuum cleaners.
As the title implies, The World Is Your Litter Box is a humorous book, premised as a how-to manual for cats and “written” by one of their own (me, with minor help from my human, Steve). The book is laugh-out-loud funny, loaded with cat attitude, and underscored by the combative, yet loving relationship between me and Steve. The book is a must-read for all cats and cat lovers!
For more information about The World Is Your Litter Box, including excerpts and reviews, please click on the URL below.
Hi every cat!
Today I want to promote this wonderful product my she-human has bought for me, a plastic plant, not exactly to decorate my scratching post as you can see.
High plastic technologies to make a flexible, durable multileaf branch, that allows to exercise and tone up muscles and whiskers, to practice paw catching skills, and get safe teeth cleaning.
Don't miss this opportunity to put a plastic plant in your life, just 75 Euro cents in Chinese stores!
Instructions to use.
*** Human-cat interactive toy.
*** Human must wave the thing in front of your cat nose.
*** To make human enjoy, cat must pretend to be fighting to save one of his seven lives.
*** Don't swallow any loose part, remember, if you get hungry during practice is better to meow for food.
... just do what I do; look cute and helpless. It works every time.
Practice your look of helplessness in front of a mirror. Or just copy my "helpless expression" - see photo. I also master the "art of cuteness" to perfection.
When you look like this, those silly humans will do anything for you. ANYTHING! They are sooooo easy : )
Hi, my name is Clovis. I am a tortoise shell mix. I should be able to play this guitar because I have thumbs on both of my front paws. I am just too tired to play it now...(yawn...meep...meep).
Meow everyone, I'm here again, Miu the Spanish Cat!
Humans are confused when they assume we only like cat food, meat, perhaps cheese and sauces... Gourmet cats like us can also appreciate vegetables, but not the kind of forage humans usually stack in their fridges. We are speaking of delicious herbs, healthy for the well functioning of our digestive tract, or easier to say, to go to the litter box.
For harvesting, we must find a good plant in the surroundings. Living in a small flat reduces the choices to get them. We may find pots in high places, behind closed windows or doors, the yard... Humans know their high culinary value and hide them from us, so persist! With a loudly "meow, meow, meow...", maybe even your human will reach you the pot to make you shut up.
If your human hasn't got them look between the neighbors, and be sure you don't get caught! Their plants are a good reason as other to start territorial conflicts between them. If anyone wants to blame you, try you have seen a mole making his house in the pot, or a worm plague devouring the plant... something credible to get some distraction, because it's now when the human notices your paw prints in the soil... Run!
Once you have it, you need the appropriate kitchen furniture to make a good cooking. And there are as many ways of preparing herbs as kinds of them, it's your choice. With the plant in the photos, I used my favorite stool to jump over the plant once an again, I chewed the herb to extract all the juice, and finally made some spaghettis of it. After working so hard I went to get some cat food... I deserved a little dessert. ; )
Bon apetit!
FROM: Miu, 04/26/08
•• 1. Find a good plant in the surroundings
•• 2. You need the appropriate kitchen furniture to make a good cooking
... you can always annoy your human with this fantastic trick (which requires 3 cats!); form a triangle and watch how cat litter and hairballs will mysteriously appear in this catangular area!
FROM: Elvis, Hektor & Miw, 04/05/08
•• BREAKING NEWS: First photo documentation of the mysterious Bermuda Catangle!
My name is Miu and I'm a Spanish cat. I live with my humans at the beautiful city of Salamanca, and as you can see, I live very well... see my round (full of food) orange belly? All thanks to my efforts training my humans.
Today I'm going to teach you useful lessons about the bed.
If you want to sleep in a comfortable bed, the first point is to be the first. When the evening reaches a reasonable hour abandon the salon, so your humans start to wonder where you have gone. A bit of concern doesn't harm anyone.
Little time after, they will show through the door to feel relief when seeing you. Of course... I've gone to get the best place in the bed. Where did you think I was going? You have deprived me from my liking to cat-girls. *Snorts*
Second point, is to choose strategically the place. The choice depends on the effect you want, a corner or low part if you want to share the bed with the couple of humans, or in the middle if you want just one of them.
Getting the bed for you alone is a difficult task, human beds are too big to cover it all with our paws. In the first option both humans will arrange themselves around you (be aware they don't knock you over to the ground while moving the blankets). In the second option, the first of the humans will throw himself in the bed, leaving the problem to the second.
Third point, you must have gone slept (or at least pretend you are). Now it's very important to be the most cute kitty in the world, see the example photos? With the previous concern, this leaves your human to feel truly guilty for removing you from the bed.
If you follow well this steps, in a few days you will win your rights to have a place at bed, and your she-human sleeping in that damned cat-basket instead of you. The he-human is a bit tough to train, but nothing is impossible.
Got it? ;)
FROM: Miu, 03/25/08
•• Tactic of the sleeping cat. I have the tip of my tongue out to make it more believable, while I watch through my almost closed eyes.
•• Here I'm making the cute kitty. Notice I'm spreading tail and paws to occupy as much bed surface as possible.
We thought you would be interested in knowing that after lots of purring and discussion, we have decided to have a try at Catolympics 08! Of course we have chosen the discipline we do best: "synchronized sleeping" !!!
I enclose two pictures featuring everyday long rehearsals. We are trying really hard, but there´s still a long way to go (especially for Nessie, who sometimes gets the choreography wrong).
Love from the South,
Gremlin
FROM: Gremlin, 03/23/08
•• Me, Fafner, Nessie and sister Feï (both got the wrong direction!)
•• Feï, Nessie and Fafner performing a highly lyrical trio movement
Here you can warn your fellow felines about disgusting cat litter that smells of cheap human perfume, or give them good advice on how to scare off annoying little children that insist on chasing you around the house and pulling your tail, or you can tell all the other clicker-cats about how YOU clicker train YOUR human to give you more treats.
JUST IN: 
